By Jan Bowen
It’s hard not to love a person this great!
Have you ever noticed that kind people are also incredibly content in their life?
That’s because being kind literally increases our levels of health and happiness. Research shows this impacts our relationships positively, as well. Kindness helps keeps couples together. The more your partner is on the receiving end of your goodwill, the more likely they are to shower you with love in return.
Kindness is pretty awesome. It creates an overall climate of trust, acceptance and comfort. And let’s be honest — in this age of violence, war, general snarkiness, and online cruelty, “being kind” is it’s own form of social rebellion. What a fun way to “stick it” to an overly harsh world.
While over-the-top “nice” people tend to annoy us, genuine kindness is a trait pretty much everyone appreciates and admires. So what’s the difference between that amazing, kind person everyone adores and, well … you? Here a seven things they do every single day that make people want to be around them:
1. They’re kind to themselves. They know that being spontaneous and generous requires having solid stores of your own positive energy. So, they take care of meeting their own needs first, before giving to others. As a result, receiving from them feels like a true gift.
2. They’re grateful. Truly and deeply grateful … for life and all its blessings, its challenges, and its lessons. In every circumstance, they take time to find and acknowledge the kernel of good — viewing every situation with a glass half full mindset. They still acknowledge what’s challenging, but in facing it, they strive to help others keep perspective, too.
3. They truly listen. Even when they have something to add, they know how to just listen first to what others say, so that the person talking feels respected and understood. They connect fully, listen with interest, and don’t censor or talk-over what others are saying.
4. They’re confident. Their self-confidence allows them to indulge their big-hearted nature without expecting anything in return. And others find this quality incredibly attractive. Every day, kind people look for opportunities to give someone the benefit of the doubt — and they do. Because they’re confident in themselves, they don’t need to take others down for every misstep.
5. They genuinely care. Kind people pay attention and your happiness and well-being are on their mind. While they respect personal boundaries, they support and celebrate what serves your higher good. They want to know how your day is, how your mom is, and that the people in your life treat you right.
6. They laugh often. Kind people see the humor and irony in situations, without the snarkiness and meanness others typically show. Life is funny! And these awesome people know that sometimes the best gift you can give someone is just helping them laugh and lighten up. Dropping a witty comment at just the right moment — they are masters light-hearted comedy.
7. They’re respectful. They thrive on diversity but don’t expect others to share their opinions. They accept your right to your own viewpoint, even if they don’t agree with it. And they would never shame or embarrass someone in any way — verbally or non-verbally. They look out for others and try to protect them from feeling small in front of others.
Small acts of kindness make a big difference.
Grand gestures don’t always mean more than small kindnesses. After all, it’s the “little things” that show an awareness of others (who they are and what they love). Kind people put their love for you into action, through small thoughtful gestures that show they care enough to pay attention. Little things like: sending cards, making a phone call, buying presents.
But life is busy, times get hectic and we don’t always have time for those extra actions.
We will, however, always have time for kindness because it is the real intention and emotion behind those actions. Follow up with those gestures when you have the time and opportunity and watch how fast those around you begin to think you’re the kindest person they know.
But when you don’t, still make the time to take care of yourself, truly listen in a conversation, and be deeply grateful. And just see if the world doesn’t seem a little … or a lot… nicer.
Jan L. Bowen is an author and certified thought leader, experienced at helping her clients facilitate their life more joyfully and easily.